Coming out is often regarded as pretty selfish. And it kind of is. But I recently found an incident that proves all that wrong.
Yesterday my friend (“The best friend“) and I were talking about the love of my life, Courteney Cox, when our other friend (“The lesbian friend“) caught up with us. Normally we have to divert the convo when someone else joins in, but this time we didn’t, because I am already out to our other friend. It was the first time we were able to say anything in reference to any of this in front of another person, and it was incredible.
My friend (“The best friend“) was practically squealing she was so happy. It’s hard to keep such a heavy secret, such a vulnerable part of someone else. And to be able to share some of that with other people — in a safe, respectful way — must be so liberating and relieving. That’s what it was: a relief. There’s a comfort for both of us in being able to speak freely with another person, which will eventually turn into more and more people. It’s hard to have the unspoken agreement about not speaking about my personal stuff in front of other people — it’s really kind of unfair to ask someone to censor themselves around other people. I’m really glad that I’m not asking her to be so careful as much, even if it’s only slightly less.